One week

I know I made a goal awhile ago that I would try to write everyday. I'm sorry to say that failed. Also that I've been avoiding my blog like the plague. No idea why. I don't want to talk about what's going on here. I'm so ready for this chapter in my life to be closed. Most of all I miss Luke.

It's 3:15am and everyone in the house is still awake. My host mom just came home and my host sister was waiting up for her, I think. Everyone else is gone. It's weird to have everyone up at this late hour.

This week is going to be the slowest week ever. I'm dreading it. This weekend has certainly been. I've been so bored that I've completely messed up my sleeping schedule. I've been sleeping super later and taking naps out of boredom. And then I can't sleep at night. So here I am. I've been burying myself in books. I'm so tired of my life right now I've been diving into other peoples'. Unfortunately most of them have just made me miss Luke more. The two I read this weekend had stupid happy endings. They just make me feel more lonely than I already am.

I don't even know why I look forward to weekends anymore. They seriously drag by slower than weekdays down here. I look forward to talking to Luke at anytime during the day because he doesn't have to work on the weekends. But then we find we have nothing to actually say to each other. I guess 5 months of separation will do that. Mostly all I can do is complain or talk about life here and I don't want to do that.

As lonely as I am I would much rather be holed up in my room than out conversing with my (Chilean) family. I can't find the energy to talk about anything anymore. I just want to go home. I just finished my last assignment on Friday so it is nice not to have homework. Although I'm not sure what to do with myself anymore. There's always so much more to do when you're procrastinating.

This is pretty much why I've been avoiding my blog. I think every post would be like this one. No need to bring others down with me. People keep telling me it's only one week but it doesn't really help. I just want to go home. Now.